Posted by Phil Lee (216.250.238.58) on May 27, 2002 at 01:04:
Voters Will Say What Dembrow's Colleagues Won't
Marc Fisher, Washington Post, May 26, 2002; Page C01
Last time I saw Dana Dembrow, he was ducking out the back door of a committee room in Annapolis, avoiding reporters who wanted to talk to him about his wife's bloody face.
That was last month, after Montgomery County police made two visits to Dembrow's house in the same weekend. On the second trip, they arrested the four-term delegate from Silver Spring and charged him with assault, saying he had bloodied his wife Suzette's nose and blackened her eyes.
At the time, Dembrow was preparing to ask voters for a promotion to the state Senate. Instead, he all but declared his life in politics over, calling his actions "disgraceful and humiliating. . . . My political and legal careers are in shambles," he added.
Then, two weeks ago, Dembrow got off when his wife refused to testify against him. Now the delegate, emboldened by her act of grace -- or fear -- is back in the race because "my family wants me to run."
Figuring this surely could not be right, I rang Suzette Dembrow at home. First thing out of her mouth, before I could finish explaining my purpose, was: "I am 100 percent behind him. I actually encouraged him to do this. Those are completely my words."
I hadn't asked about that.
She went on: "I truly believe he's an incredible politician. He's put 120 percent into politics and fatherhood. Maybe that's been some of the marital problem. I just think whatever happens between Dana and I happens, but he needs to be in office."
This was one of those interviews in which I barely asked a question. Suzette Dembrow handled both ends of the conversation just fine. "I'm sure there are women out there who will say, 'Oh, she's just one of those wives who . . . ' " and her voice trailed off. But only for a second: "Well, I have a degree in family therapy, so I know all about 'If they hit you once, they'll hit you again.' But Dana is not a wife beater. We had a bad weekend, and it wasn't all his fault.
"There are a lot of women out there who've been physically abused by their husband, and they call me and offer to help the abused wife. But that's not it. This was one bad incident, 14 years. I'm not supposed to talk to reporters -- my attorney will drop me. But I have to say it. I was under duress. I had a physical condition. I'm just gonna say it: Dana is not a wife beater. He never threatened me before."
The couple met in Annapolis in 1987, when Dembrow, newly elected, enlisted Suzette's sister to ask Suzette, a former swimsuit model, over to his corner of Fran O'Brien's bar to say hi.
It wasn't long before the two were the capital's fun couple. At a Halloween party, Dembrow covered his body in black makeup, donned a loincloth and stuck a bone in his hair. His wife went for a low-cut leopardskin costume with a whip. That became a campaign issue when Dembrow ran for Congress in a majority-black district. He did not win.
Before they'd been married a year, Suzette Dembrow, wearing an itsy-bitsy bikini, made the finals of a best-body contest in Annapolis. The next year, the Dembrows were at a birthday party in Hyattsville when police raided the house and confiscated $7,000 worth of cocaine. "I think I'm hanging out with the wrong crowd," Dana Dembrow said then. There were only nine people at the party, but somehow, he didn't know the birthday boy's name.
Suzette Dembrow says she doesn't know whether the couple will stay together. "We are seeing a minister and counseling, and we're just going to take it one baby step at a time," she said. I finally got a question in: Why put this out in public? Why suffer the humiliation?
Because that's what her husband is, a creature of the public, Suzette said. Should voters care about the family affairs of the people they elect? "That's a tough question," she said. "I don't think that's their business."
Yet she knows it will come up this fall, whether Dembrow tries to keep his House seat or pushes for the Senate. "It's going to be an ugly race," she said. "I'm not going to door-knock, but I'll be there by his side, and not because he asked me to."
Dembrow's colleagues in Annapolis did nothing after the arrest. Most wouldn't talk about it. Easier to leave this to voters, who won't be so shy.
Here's what they'll say: Dana, what you did was bad enough. Dragging your family back into the muck is despicable. Too bad you couldn't see that on your own. Goodbye, Dana.